windinthemaples: A lane of red maple trees in riotous fall color. (Default)
[personal profile] windinthemaples
I haven't posted much of substance about Graeme in quite some time! In September, he'll turn three years old. I can't wrap my mind around that. Three! While I'll have keenly felt the exhaustion of those thousand plus days of parenting, it still is an amazing feat. Three! Certainly no longer a baby and well on his way to becoming a little boy. Pardon the ramble, but I don't want to forget!

He has become a complete nightowl here in Florida. Back in the old days, when I was nursing him to sleep, I'd often miss out on everything because I'd be going to sleep at 6pm and getting up, alone in the world, with him at 3 or 4am. Now, Daniel and I are hoping he'll go to sleep so we can follow suit! He's suddenly shown a complete aversion for his bed. Like, it is extremely fun to jump on but a fate worse than death at night! Instead, he'll stay up until midnight and then curl up to sleep on the living room floor. We wait until he's good and asleep and carry him to bed. Some nights, he'll wake up frantically calling our names (he sleeps three feet away from us) and we haul him up into bed between us for the rest of the night. It's weird. I'm sure there's logic there for him. :)

We are transitioning, about two and a half years too late, to cloth diapers. He loves them, but there is no doubt that they need to be changed more frequently than disposable. I'm not quite with the program yet, so there are still times I turn around to find that he's exceeded max capacity and is standing in a pair of wet shorts. I thought the laundry would be disgusting and never-ending, but really that aspect of it has been easy-peasy. I still put him in a disposable overnight, but I imagine that'll stop once I figure out the timing of everything. Really, though, I'm super happy with the cloth. I can imagine how fuzzy and nice it must feel to wear them! Last month, when I put the first trial FuzziBunz diaper on, he cooed to himself, "Oh! These are very comfy diapers, Mommy!" :D Out of curiosity, I've let him pick whether he wanted to wear a cloth or disposable diaper at every change and he has *always* picked cloth. So that's going swimmingly.

At last check, Graeme is about 33 lbs and stands 3'2". He's getting away with clothes in the 3T/4T range and has giant size 10 feet. :) Our get-him-in-the-NBA retirement plans are really proceeding nicely. ;)

He is still watching more television than he should, though it buys me some delightful showering, reading, and internet time each week. His favorite shows, if he could craft his dream line-up, would be Blue's Clues, Super Why!, Team Umizoomi, Special Agent Oso, Sesame Street, and Dora the Explorer.

Graeme is learning to read. He loves playing games with some "flashing" cards we have that have letters and phonics. Some words, like "cat", he can read on sight. Others, with some prompting like "That word is a color. What color starts with the letter "R"? or "Do you know what animal's name this is?" he can get. He knows all the letters, upper and lower case, and knows what sounds they make. One of his favorite games currently goes like this:

1. He drives his open-bed toy truck around the toy room, looking for any animals that are waiting for a ride. They call out to him in some hilarious toddler impersonations of animals speaking, and hop in. He drives the truck with one big push across the room to the white board where I'm waiting.


2. Each animal takes a turn approaching me with a plea for help and asking me to write their name on the board.

3. I ask for a little help, so they usually tell me what letter their names start with.

4. Very often, the animals then count to see how many letters are in their names.

5. Graeme will then do some voice projecting and next thing you know small, plaintive animal pleas can be heard from across the room. "Do you hear that?" he'll ask with false concern, "someone else needs a ride over here!"

6. The old animals will load back into the truck, get pushed back across the room, where new animals will join.

By the time we're done, I might have the names of thirty animals on the white board. Zebra, Elephant, Anteater, Porcupine, Fish, Dog, Panda Bear, Rabbit, etc etc etc. The animals are all thrilled to have their names restored to them. :)

Graeme is such a good-hearted little boy. He says when he grows up, he wants to be a superhero to help and/or save people. The other day, at an indoor playspace, he saw one of the adults cleaning up drop a toy, unbeknownst to her, and walk away. He picked up what she'd dropped and raced after her, unbidden, to return it. "Here, you dropped your toy!" All of his games involve, in some way or another, helping. At the park, he likes to help clean up litter to help the squirrels have a nice place to live. His toy animals are always asking for and receiving help to do things. When one lion cub is scared to go down a slide, a mommy zebra is there to help encourage him. He astounds me with how purehearted, kind, empathetic, and willing-to-serve he can be. The other day, he had this kinda sad experience at a park behind the library. I think it sorta illustrates his personality and the sort of things I want to insulate him from.

The park was empty as it was the hottest part of the day. He played by himself, climbing up and sliding down slides and collecting and counting pinecones with me. Then, a mom arrived with her three children. One, a little girl, was Graeme's age. She came up to him and just stared. He smiled and said, "Hi! What's your name?" She ran away. He turned to her retreating back and called out, "Wait! Wait for me!" but she was soon across the park. He asked me what her name was. "I don't know", I said, "but you could go ask her Mommy." The mom was standing only ten or so feet away from us while her daughter was maybe 50 feet away. So Graeme trots up to the mother, stands at her knee, looks up and says, "Hi! My name is Baby Graeme. What is your baby's name?" She looks down at him and walks away without replying.

So then he comes back to me, deflated, and says, "I am very sad." "Why are you sad?" "I'm sad because nobody wants to play with me."

Knife through heart.

A few minutes later, Graeme gave it a game try again. He followed the three kids up onto a bit playground structure and was going to follow them down a big slide. He sat down and said, "I'm scared", which was really just an invitation to play with (and encourage) him. The six year-old boy in the group called him a scaredy-weiner. The mother says, "Tyler! You can say that to your little sister but you canNOT say things like that to children you don't know." (OMGWTFBBQ)

So Graeme kinda glumly scooted back from the top of the slide and climbed down the stairs back to me. The mom was rummaging in her purse and looking irritated. Graeme walked back up to her and said, "Do you need help? I can help you!"

Again, she just looked down at him and then went back to whatever she was doing.

I smiled, sweet as pie, and repeated what he'd said to her. "Oh, yes I thought that's what he said. What does he think he's going to help me with?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe he'll get us a sunshade and some grapes, maybe fan us with a palm frond. *chuckles* It can be sad for my son to go to the park because he's so much more socially mature than other children. He strikes up conversations, introduces himself, invites others to play with him and people don't bother to respond. He doesn't know what to make of it."

I said it all with a friendly smile, but really I think my point was pointy enough. I was pissed. She got flustered and started pretending an interest in him. Luckily, though, the third child, maybe a seven year old girl, noticed his sadness and came over to adopt him. She held his hand and slid down the slide with him a few times and waited for him to catch up as they roamed over the park together. The little boy turned his terrorizing back to his two year-old sister, who he pushed down, sat on, and made fun of some more. :/ :/

I'd thought, for a long time, that he was the socially awkward one because he isn't in daycare with all his peers. What we've recently discovered, watching him interact with kids his age, is that he's actually the one way ahead of the pack. He's so polite and interested and eager to please and the random kids he's running into just--aren't. A quiet, well-behaved 5-7 year old is about his speed. They so rarely realize it, though, and so there are so many missed opportunities.

Graeme is in love with board games. He's very good, learns the rules and patiently waits for his turn. I've challenged him with games for much older children and he still holds his own. The favorites though are Candy Land and the Cranium game Caraboo Island which he mastered pretty much immediately and is playing on the "Advanced" mode. He's brilliant. He's also damned lucky. I've honestly *never* beat him in a game. Ever. That's all luck of the draw/dice and I'm not letting him win. He does it all by himself. :)

Graeme's favorite toys and activities haven't changed a lot. He loves his Viewmaster, since I have a couple reels with animal pictures on it. (Wish I could find more.) He also adores flashcards, of any sort, and the opportunity to show off how much he knows. The dry erase board, with colored markers, is a big hit as is his box of Schleich animal figures. He's starting to really appreciate playing ball and isn't coloring/drawing/painting quite as much as he used to, though he still enjoys it. The library is one of his favorite places on the entire planet, where we read books together at a little wooden table and chairs. I'm trying to think what else. One of his best friends, of the inanimate variety, is a stuffed Magenta beanie plush from Blue's Clues. He loves to talk to her and for her or have me talk for her. ;) He's also carting around one of those Cabbage Patch werewolf-hybrid-crazy animal dolls that he spied across the room at a thrift store and cried frantically, "THAT'S FRANKIE!! THAT'S FRANKIE! FRANKIE!!". (Frankie had to come home with us. Being a twenty or thirty year old toy, I wonder if it was a past life thing? Either way, it was a bizarre, sweet encounter.)

Graeme has a new pair of shoes, since his feet have grown right out of the last pair. They're white with purple and silver highlights, he picked them himself, and he's so proud and in love with them. He calls them his "purple shoes" and spent at least two weeks approaching every person he could find to ask, "Do you like my new purple shoes?". ;)

Graeme-speech:
"Snake" still sounds like "Cake".
"That's a goob idea, isn't it, Mommy?"
*looking down at his diaper* "Who is pouring water in there?"
"I don't want to lay down! I want to lay up!"

Date: 2010-05-07 01:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greyeyedpixie.livejournal.com
Graeme sounds like such a wonderful child. :)

Date: 2010-05-07 04:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
He's really an awesome person to know. :) I hope you get to meet him someday.

Date: 2010-05-07 08:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greyeyedpixie.livejournal.com
I'd really like that. :)

Date: 2010-05-07 02:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neva-butterfly.livejournal.com
He's such a beautiful caring soul, a wonderful little boy.

Date: 2010-05-07 04:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
Thank you. He really is. :)

Date: 2010-05-07 02:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] willow-cabin.livejournal.com
My heart filled with so much love reading this. It will be so wonderful for him to read all of your posts about his babyhood when he’s older! Thank you for sharing it.

Date: 2010-05-07 04:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
Thank you! I love the thought of him having something to read when I'm gone. Like, he can see himself through the lens of my eyes.

Date: 2010-05-07 03:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rubymulligan.livejournal.com
Awwwww! <3 G! He's so grown up. I'd love to go up against him in a board game challenge :)

Date: 2010-05-07 03:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
Seriously. He'd crush us all. :D

Date: 2010-05-07 03:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aerialmelodies.livejournal.com
First off, the park story makes me so sad and angry. I get that kids are kids and are at different points in their growing up (though that doesn't excuse the behavior parents let kids get away with). The adults, however... what the hell. If a kid even LOOKS at me, I engage with them, smile, laugh, try to chat, give them a treat (with parental permission)... kids respond positively to positive stimuli. Heck, adults normally do too. It really irks me that those parents treated Graeme that way. Even if the mom didn't need help with her purse, she could've easily said "No thank you, but we could look for a pretty leaf together" or something, I dunno, more positive than ignoring him? I could go on and on I'm sure, and the sad thing is that I don't even want a child of my own but even I understand how to behave and act with kids. It's a freeing experience if people will stop seeing a kid and either a) ignoring them or b) thinking they're a snot-nosed brat. NOT TRUE AT ALL. Sigh. Sorry, Graeme and Rachel. :(

ETA: Love that the one little girl came over to play. Sweetheart with a heart of gold and I'm sure she gave Graeme the confidence boost he needed after all that negative ignorance from the other people.

Everything else, though? Cuuuuuute. I love how he says he's "Baby Graeme" and he loves the cloth diapers and loves learning and reading... and board games? Kid after my own heart. I'd definitely play with him if I lived closer! <3
Edited Date: 2010-05-07 03:51 pm (UTC)

Date: 2010-05-07 03:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
I know not everyone wants to play with a two year-old, but what appalls me is the lack of common courtesy. Like, if someone says to you, "Good morning! How are you today?" even if you're busy or you don't know them or whatever, it is very easy and socially imperative to say, "Good morning. Fine, thank you!" or whatever back. Like, that's a minimum. I don't need anyone to go off and play charades with Graeme but it is frustrating when he is exhibiting the social niceties and they can't even grace it with a short, appropriate response. I worry that at some point, he won't bother anymore! So that's total sadness. Or like, at the library he'll go up to ask for a specific kind of book and they won't look at him, right in front of their desk--they'll ignore him and look up to me, standing six feet behind, as if I have to do the asking. Like, he's there. He's a very intelligent, very perceptive, very mature human being in a short body. Treat him that way!

So yeah, that's my parenting rant of the day. ;) :D

Date: 2010-05-07 04:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aerialmelodies.livejournal.com
Aww, I do feel you (as much as I can without a kid of my own). It's so sad that people can't take two seconds to smile and say thank you or no thanks or ask how a child is doing if they look up at you. Hopefully Graeme will find a nice group of children - and parents! - to engage in conversations with. Not that his family isn't amazing, but it'd be so nice to hear happy stories of him playing "save the animal with the firetruck" with some other kids who have an equally as wild imagination. Really spark his creativity further! If that makes sense. :)

Seriously, I wish I was closer so I could meet him and play board games. I loooooove board games, especially with kids. They make them so much more fun with calling out rules and hilarious answers. :D

Date: 2010-05-08 04:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
I'm looking forward (who woulda thunk it?) to getting back to Chicago in a few weeks. I hope to find some children in the area who'll want to befriend Graeme. :D

Date: 2010-05-07 03:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] costumenut.livejournal.com
He sounds like an amazing little boy, and you are incredibly fortunate to have him. Can't wait for some kidlets of my own!!! :-)

Date: 2010-05-08 04:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
You know, I have to recommend it. I never liked babysitting much, but having a child of my own is pretty awesome. :D

Date: 2010-05-07 04:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cloverdew.livejournal.com
Rachel, he is obviously a very special little boy. Mature and smart and adorable and very open, honest, kind. Exactly what every parent would want in a child! You should be proud of yourself and your little boy.

It makes me wish I were closer so I could babysit, or at least come and play!

Hopefully he will make some friends at the park soon... sounds like he's going to be a heartthrob later in life. I'm sure he'll be breaking hearts all over the playground before you know it. ;)

I hate when people talk to babies with "baby talk" and treat them differently than they would other people their age. I always try to get down to their level (physically) and then engage with them as I would with anyone else. Just because they're little and cute doesn't mean they're not people. The smarter you treat them, the smarter they become.

Date: 2010-05-08 04:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
I agree! :) I don't know about you, but I was always one of those old soul children that had more in common with the adults than the kids in any gathering. I *hated* being treated like I was an idiot or something less-than. I was lucky my mom always treated me like a very short adult. :D

Date: 2010-05-08 12:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elfinecstasy.livejournal.com
I adore him.

Date: 2010-05-08 04:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
Thank you. That love, in the universe, can only do good things in his life. :) {{{hugs}}}

Date: 2010-05-08 07:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ilea.livejournal.com
Yano I think if I would have tore that woman a new one. I mean how rude! Indira has problems with kids her age because they aren't on her level and they frustrate her. But adults? Anytime she has said hi to an adult they have acknowledged her. I mean UGH! what was her problem?

Graeme sounds lovely. Someday I'd like to meet him.

Hey did you know you can make your own viewmaster sets? My grandpa and I used to make our own out of photo slides. Here's some blank reels:
http://www.3dstereo.com/viewmaster/makereels2.html

That site also has a pretty good selection of viewmaster sets too.

Date: 2010-05-08 12:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sugarmaplelife.livejournal.com
Oh, wow! Thank you for the link. That's awesome! :D

Date: 2010-05-08 01:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] azhure.livejournal.com
Aww, Graeme is such a sweetie :) I can't believe that people were being so rude and ignoring him :(

Date: 2010-05-08 04:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] folkchick3.livejournal.com
He sounds like a loving, creative, inaginative, true hearted, compassionatate, caring little soul - what a beautiful, beautiful little boy, outside and in. And give yourself some credit! What you see is the result of loving, deliberate, interactive parenting - it does not happen by itself.

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